Jim Gibbons Governor of Nevada He had a 10% approval rating. He had too many scandals for Nevada to handle.

John Ensign Nevada Senator [...]]]> Time magazine stretched itself today to note the obvious, namely that sexual harassers Jim Gibbons and John Ensign are among the least influential non-celebrities on the planet:

Jim Gibbons
Governor of Nevada
He had a 10% approval rating. He had too many scandals for Nevada to handle.

John Ensign
Nevada Senator
His sex scandal is so confusing — he gave a job to the husband of the woman he was cheating on his wife with (I think) — that it’s taking forever for him to be thrown out of office. (Time)

Time is an example of a type of news medium, once popular in the 19th and 20th centuries, called a “news magazine,” sometimes printed on expensive, glossy paper and funded by corporate elites to keep their names, and their corporations, out of those very magazines. I note this for our younger readers, who may never have seen one. A “news magazine,” I mean. Not a corporate elite.

The Guv did respond to the accolade saying: “I guess TIME doesn’t think fighting for lower taxes, smaller government and the constitution is influential.” (Fox5) Well, TIME might be more impressed if the person doing all that fighting (a) had a chance in Hell of actually winning the fight and (b) wasn’t so preoccupied thinking up a weekly gaffe.

Meanwhile…How ironicabobble is it that alleged Chrissy Mazzeo masher Jim Gibbons gets all upset in the latest campaign missive from the Official Re-elect Jim Gibbons In-kind Contributions Committee in the Gube’s office about an alleged federal “intrusion”?

“I want a Nevadan in this fight against this federal intrusion,” Governor Jim Gibbons said about federal health care, “I will not surrender to this federal assault and I will not succumb to political pressure while the rights of Nevada citizens are trampled.”

Woof. All that talk about a federal “assault” and “surrender” and “pressure” and trampling and succumbing.  Sounds like a night out with Siggy and the Gube.

Meanwhile…Chuck Muth tells us he doesn’t like Gibbons for bungling his–Gibbons’ not Muth’s–administration, and he doesn’t like Brian Sandoval for Governor because he–Sandoval, not Muth– is too much of a lefty.  Yet he insists that doomed Mike Montandon is “considered both a solid conservative as well as trustworthy.” (NevadaAppeal) The latter can only prompt those of us still living in the center of the foreclosure crater left over from Mikey’s tenure as mayor of North Las Vegas to laugh bitterly…until we choke on our tears.

Hey, Newshounds! The next time you’re stuck in a room with the ex-mayor and feeling bored, ask him about Gregory Rose, or about “More Cops,” or about the North Las Vegas Housing Authority. You know, just for giggles.

Oh, never mind. Nobody cares about the ex-mayor’s run. Rightly so.

Meanwhile…Yet another benefit of the Gibbons’–and everybody else’s–no taxes pledge: prison violence grows while guards take their mandatory furloughs. Guess we should all hope that Gibbons soon pays off Dawn and ends that divorce–so that her security team can be reassigned to the prison riot units.

Meanwhile…isn’t it just like the Gube to screw up an ethic complaint from the GOP against some Democrats by doing what they did? (INP)

Meanwhile…The Guv keeps wowing them in Winnemucca, for what that’s worth.

And, boy howdy, IS he still in it! Along the way Gibbons ended up throwing his support [...]]]> Shew! Looks like Jimbo Gibbons is still in the Gube race. Despite having blown his load–campaign money I mean–on his now ex-campaign manager and soldiering on without any manager in sight, Gibbons said today that he’s still in it. (Fox5)

And, boy howdy, IS he still in it! Along the way Gibbons ended up throwing his support to none other than John “Screw the Help” Ensign, known for screwing the help in more ways than one.

Jimbo described Ensign’s sexual harassment of an employee and then paying her and the hubby off to cover it up like this:

John’s a wonderful friend and I believe in his heart he was doing what he thought was right. And it’s unfortunate that it crossed maybe a line or two (Fox5)

Ah, yes, maybe a line or two. But just maybe, mind you. In Jimboland, you don’t cross the line even if you threaten your date with rape and a slap or two. Oh, and don’t forget the cover-up. It doesn’t count without a cover-up.

And then the Gube calls up this principle of American justice:

But in this day and age, you’re innocent until you’re proven guilty. Let’s not jump to conclusions about it.

Now you historians take a deep breath before you get going about that “this day and age.” The presumption of innocence goes back to 1895 in the U.S. and maybe back to Deuteronomy. (TalkLeft) But besides that, in Jimboland that presumption doesn’t hold if your Obama talking about Vegas or Harry Reid talking about healthcare.

But, hey, Gibbons wouldn’t be Gibbons if he weren’t talking out of both sides of his head at once. Let us RIROs just be content that Jimbo’s still in the race!

Elsewhere: Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington on Gibbers and the Hair ‘do.

Could it be that she's eyeing the Senator's, [...]]]> Yes, the latest John Ensign, Tom Coburn, Mike Slanker revelations are indeed amusing, but would anyone be willing to speculate why Congressperson Shelley Berkley's people are sending out a link to a Politico write up suggesting that the Senate Ethics Committee will probably be investigating Ensign's lobbying shenanighans?

Could it be that she's eyeing the Senator's, um, vulnerabilities?

One wonders what other possible interpretation could be put to Senator Schtup's remarks, such as:

"We are now facing a situation where there is almost a shadow Cabinet that is being [...]]]>
Yep, it's Adulterer versus Wannabe-Rodeo-Sexter-Adulterer, Groper v. Groper, as John Ensign attacks the administration of Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons for having too many czars.

One wonders what other possible interpretation could be put to Senator Schtup's remarks, such as:

"We are now facing a situation where there is almost a shadow Cabinet that is being developed. It is thwarting the position of the United States Congress and these czars are in different positions." (RJ)

And

“I believe that more
information should be disclosed about top-level advisors within the
Administration,” Ensign said.  “The American people have the right to
know more about czars.  We need to know their roles, responsibilities,
and have a good understanding of their background.” (SenSchtup)

It's well known that gubernor Jim Gibbons' administration is heavy with czars. There's the energy czar–whose nationality escaped the governor for a year or two, the (fired) Homeland Security czar, the forgotten SAGE commission efficiency czar, and the drudge, wannabe-stimulus czar, who can't seem to spend any stimulus money cuz he's always busy writing letters to the state controller's office for not respecting his, as the Senator might say, "shadow Cabinet" status.

I think we can all actually agree with the spirit of Senator Soiled-Suit's sentiment: we should know more about all these Gibbons' czars. But, to try to salvage what's left of his political career by attacking a goner, lame-duck has-been like Gibbons, seems even a bit low for an employee sex-abuser like Mr. Ensign.

Mr. Ensign, have you no shame? Or pants?

So, let's see if we can figure out what happened: John Ensign, on his Please Help Me Find My Pants And My Dignity Again tour, said something about how he created John Sandoval ex nihilo from matter devoid of any political form and how Sandoval would make a nifty Gube, far niftier [...]]]> Especially from other Republicans.

So, let's see if we can figure out what happened: John Ensign, on his Please Help Me Find My Pants And My Dignity Again tour, said something about how he created John Sandoval ex nihilo from matter devoid of any political form and how Sandoval would make a nifty Gube, far niftier than anything currently haunting the manse, anyways.

Sandoval, who doesn't want any of Ensign's philandering cooties to rub off on him, said something to the effect that Ensign should please not stand so close to him. Gubewannabe Mike "Pigeon Man" Montandon got all upset because Ensign, like everybody else, was ignoring birdman's campaign. All the while, everyone remained unsurprised that Ensign, like everyone else, has simply given up on the current Gube's chances for re-election. (Sun)

Meanwhile, Gibbons remains wildly popular with the 17% percent of Nevadans who still miss Calvin Coolidge. Ensign putts in close behind. (Kos)

This one uses the Senator's own words about his "big mistake" to turn a negative into a big positive!

Um…doesn't sound too braggy, [...]]]> This John Ensign slogan comes from up north:

Course, it attacks our patriotic whore industry, but nonetheless looks like a winner.

This one uses the Senator's own words about his "big mistake" to turn a negative into a big positive!

Um…doesn't sound too braggy, does it?

Fun Facts!

From a comment on TPMmuckraker:

I can't imagine anyone fucking this guy. Eeeewww.

Tho, not everybody had that opinion:

Is John Ensign a bisexual swinger?

Inquiring minds want to know…

To which an inquiring mind responded:

Then there's this:

Christian politicians and [...]]]> In my humble, twisted opinion.

From a comment on TPMmuckraker:

I can't imagine anyone fucking this guy. Eeeewww.

Tho, not everybody had that opinion:

Oh, I don't mean the junior Senator from Nevada, who's imitation of Nevada's first groper has certainly been entertaining. Who can't enjoy myriads of newspaper reports all ending up pretty much the same: with a reminder that Nevada is the state with the gropey guv?

Now, Ensign has admitted to an indiscretion similar to [...]]]>

Oh, I don't mean the junior Senator from Nevada, who's imitation of Nevada's first groper has certainly been entertaining. Who can't enjoy myriads of newspaper reports all ending up pretty much the same: with a reminder that Nevada is the state with the gropey guv?

Now, Ensign has admitted to an indiscretion similar to accusations
dogging Gibbons, who's embroiled in a messy divorce and ranks among
Nevada's least popular politicians. (LAT)

One difference, tho. Ensign seems to have consummated his affairs, while Gibbers' victims tend to fight him off.

No, I mean the loony toons running against the Guv for the privilege of representing that 11% who think Nevada should be 100% privatized–policed by mining hired goons and educated by blackjack dealers, I'm guessing.

The Republican gube-wannabes, Joe Heck and Mike Montandon, were spotted the other day protesting Gibbons' non-vote for the visitors' tax and for not negotiating more with the Legislature. No, the problem isn't that Gibbers didn't spend more time with the Legos shoring up health care or education. Nope, he should have spent more time negotiating to keep the puny tax hikes' down:

Montandon accused Gibbons of failing to build enough of an alliance in the Legislature to prevent the tax increase.

"Do you remain true to your (no-tax) pledge when you know full well
that your veto can be overriden?" Montandon asked. "Just standing on no
new taxes isn't enough. He had to come up with a plan and he had to
sell that plan to both the citizens and the Legislature. He wasn't able
to do so."  (AP)

So, the Republican primary scramble will be a fight over who's the least no-new-taxiest. Such a seductive platform!

Meanwhile, the Lahotan pape was upset for the Gube's dawdlin' over his new pick for Adjutant General for the Guard:

Nevada's 28th adjutant general left her post on Saturday. Maj. Gen.
Cindy Kirkland spent the last four years of her 31-year career as the
state's top military leader, yet Gov. Jim Gibbons decided to replace
her without explanation and without a successor before Saturday.

The
governor has known about the expiration of Kirkland's term for some
time, yet he procrastinated in naming a successor until Tuesday, three
days after the ceremony. It is no secret within the Nevada National
Guard that Gibbons wanted someone else in the top spot as far back as
2006 after he was elected governor. That is his prerogative, but
Gibbons' recent decisions have not been decisive from a Nevada Air
Guard pilot hailed as a war hero during Desert Storm. (LVN)

"War hero"? Gibbons makes a mollusk look decisive.

Hey look, a few rats seem to smell a sinking ship. (Sun,RGJ) Josh Hick's departure will leave the banking lobbyist Mendy Elliot running the Gube's office. Now the folks who gave us our mini-Depression are running the state. Mmm. That's good government!